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Friday, October 21, 2011

Mother of Four

I have found myself doing things lately that I never thought I would do. These things might solely be attributed to my personality but I think it's because I'm now a mother of four. I'm not sure where the tipping point was, probably somewhere between kids 2 and 4, but desperate times call for desperate measures!

You know you are a mother of four when...
  • You can feed a baby and change its diaper without lifting your head off the pillow. 
  • A small smear of infant poop on your shirt isn't a good enough reason to change it. (I would have changed if it had been stinky, big kid poop, but the newborn variety seems so benign).
  • Your neighbors don't recognize you when you don't have your brood with you. 
  • You can go through three wrong names before you remember the name of the child standing in front of you. 
  • You try using the 3-2-1 countdown on your husband. 
  • You fake having to go to the bathroom to get a few minutes to yourself. (Not that it matters because someone always follows you and sticks their fingers under the door or knocks on it like Sheldon Cooper)
  • You carry your baby upstairs in a basket of laundry to save yourself a second trip.
  • You are in a public place and can take child number 3 to the bathroom and the drinking fountain with out taking child number 4 off the boob or exposing yourself. Twice. 
  • 4 out of 7 days during the week you trade your shower for an extra 30 min of sleep. 
  • Your infant drops the pacifier under the dinner table for the third time you use your toes to pick it up by the handle, wipe it off on your pants and had it back. 
  • You feel entitled to the Nobel Peace prize when you can get them all to take an afternoon nap at the same time. 
  • Going to the dentist or doctor by yourself feels like a mini vacay. 
  • If the the temperature is right, you park in the garage and let the kiddos continue their nap there rather than take the chance they won't stay asleep if you try and transfer them to their beds. 
  • You are walking hand in hand with your hubby and you can't get used to holding a hand larger than your own. 
  • You find yourself clearing the dishes from one meal so you can set the table for the next. 
  • Your kids see you cleaning up and want to know who is coming over. 
  • You get your kids to help by playing Simon Says. "Simon says touch your nose! Simon says pick up two books and put them in the book case!"
  • You dress your children from the laundry basket more often than from their dresser
  • It takes you a week to finish this blog because you only get to blog on your phone while you nurse and that means doing it 20 minutes at a time and all with one thumb.   

I'm sure there are lots more too. Feel free to add any that you find yourself doing as well!

3 comments:

  1. Here's my addition...you know you're a frazzled forgetful mother of 4 when your friend tells you she's pregnant (again!) and you look at her like she's nuts and say, "You're crazy, Launa! You'll have 4 kids under the age of six!"

    And then she calmly looks back at you like *your* nuts and says, "Yeah...just like you did!"

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  2. I simply love this blog. Thank you, Launa.
    By the way...
    You know you're a mom of 7 when, in the process of walking to the back of Costco, your children become rather strung out (in the literal fashion) and the woman trying Lazy-boy recliners hops to her feet, salutes, and begins to sing, "I love a parade."

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